One of the biggest myths about writers is that they are recluses, who sit behind a computer, never letting the problems of the world enter their private space. The reality is that writers are out in the world with everyone else, and all the problems that come with it.
The Movie “The Princess Bride” has a line in it that I always thought was true to a point. “Life is pain, highness. Anyone who says different is trying to sell you something.” I did mention that it was to a point. How we handle the situation will determine whether it will end good or bad.
I know, while we are going through the painful times in our lives, it’s very hard to imagine anything but more pain coming of it, but there is always an end to it. The best thing to keep in mind, it’s through the most painful times in our lives that we find ourselves becoming stronger.
There are two things that help me through the hardest times; the friends that I have, and the ideas I get for writing. This is where writers are different. Yes, we feel pain, sadness, anger, and sorrow, but we can turn it around by writing about our feelings, and the stories that have come out of it. In a way, we can vent our frustration, without taking it out on someone else, causing them pain.
I know I already mentioned Nora Ephron’s saying, “Everything is copy.” This is one of those times it bears repeating. Time may heal all wounds, but it still leaves scars, and the best way of reducing those scars is to write about it. There is no such thing as an “off limit” subject, and if you are worried about offending a friend, or relative, don’t. Just change the names. The purpose is to write through your problems, and air out your feelings so you can move forward in the healing process.
The best part of writing it down, and working through your pain, is that you can share it with someone else who may be going through the same thing. Of course, while you are writing through your pain, don’t forget that you have friends who are always there to help you, and are just a phone call, or e-mail away. It’s good to write about the troubled times of your life, but it’s a bad idea to shut yourself away from them; you can find comfort in your friends, and stories in your writing. Use them both to help you heal.